This week on the road, I learned that not everyone literally means ‘two minutes’ when they ask if I “have two minutes to hear a story?”

In fact, when some people say that, they mean something more like “I’d like to bait you into this room where I’ll block the door and then proceed to tell you the longest story you’ve ever heard in your life that has absolutely nothing to do with anything we’ve talked about up to this point. My story will be void of interesting highlights and a point but you have agreed to listen to it. Then only way this will end is when you’ve had enough to the point where you no longer care about interrupting me mid-sentence to say that you’re running late for an imaginary appointment. You will notice that I was born without the basic human instinct to detect when someone is no longer interested in my story. I will talk to you until my face is sore.”

Man, I’m going to be nervous the next time somebody asks me if I have two minutes to talk.