If you’re a Civil War reenactment enthusiast who is all charged up about a big 3-day weekend reenactment-fest out in the woods with your club of fellow adult make-believers, I’ll bet it would be a huge disappointment to learn that you’re going to be killed off in the first reenactment battle 10 minutes after you suit up. Because if your reenactment brigade is one that stays true to reality, you have no choice but to lay there really still for the entire three days.

While you’re laying motionless on the ground trying not to flinch as a Carpenter Ant enters your nostril,  everyone else is eating squirrel cooked over an open fire followed by in-character fellowship around the camp fire. I wonder if those who continuously get that assignment see it as the first sign they’re about to be booted from the club because their acting skills aren’t up to snuff or they’ve just made too many waves with club management? If I were to get that assignment, I’d refuse to do it and would write my own script that day (which would include lots of whiskey and very few inhibitions) because what are they going to do – kick me out?